tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-17042141.post3113123105409495567..comments2023-06-19T15:18:37.189+02:00Comments on My So-Called Life in France: Go "Vous" Yourself.Madame Khttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10711262100071626133noreply@blogger.comBlogger16125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-17042141.post-50296438808553118722007-12-07T10:28:00.000+01:002007-12-07T10:28:00.000+01:00My boss tu-toies me and I hate it. Everybody tu-t...My boss tu-toies me and I hate it. Everybody tu-toies everyone on the team, but tu-toi-ing the boss just. seems. wrong.<BR/><BR/>I avoid speaking to him in French if I can.<BR/><BR/>I would much prefer it if he vous-voied me, then I could vous-voie him too.JChevaishttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02683339168047479228noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-17042141.post-36442392594233575202007-12-01T14:49:00.000+01:002007-12-01T14:49:00.000+01:00My problem is the opposite. My French language ski...My problem is the opposite. My French language skills are still in their infancy, but I've focused on 'vous' forms as I figured it was better to be safe than sorry. But DH's friends and family are always correcting me, insisting with 'tu'. They don't get that I can only learn ONE at the moment!Cherisehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/18309835002251352483noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-17042141.post-52937304656220698312007-11-29T17:54:00.000+01:002007-11-29T17:54:00.000+01:00Philippe tried to convince me that there is someth...Philippe tried to convince me that there is something really charming about the transition from tu to vous-- that it marks the beginning of something: a friendship, a camaraderie, that sort of thing. Like the existance of 'vous' allows for the specialness of 'tu'. Something like that.<BR/><BR/>I get it, but I don't care. I tutoyer everybody and figure I can get away with it because I'm Americaine. We don't stand on ceremony. ;)ashtanga en cevenneshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02979153677859447117noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-17042141.post-73781110703087158062007-11-26T07:52:00.000+01:002007-11-26T07:52:00.000+01:00Yeah, yeah, yeah--I use vous untill told otherwise...Yeah, yeah, yeah--I use vous untill told otherwise, but still--I think it's dumb as sin.<BR/><BR/>I've also come to understand that using "vous" is also some kind of status thing. Like in wealthy snob families, children "vous" their parents. Even husbands and wives use the "vous" form. I'm thinking of implementing this rule with our eventual crumb-snatchers just to be ridiculous. <BR/><BR/>Also, I will not be studying my verbs anytime soon. After 5 years here, I just don't care anymore. At least I speak 1.5 languages. Most people in France barely speak one.Madame Khttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10711262100071626133noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-17042141.post-10110997493610408482007-11-25T21:52:00.000+01:002007-11-25T21:52:00.000+01:00Brings back the memories! Ha!The best thing is to ...Brings back the memories! Ha!<BR/>The best thing is to STUDY YOUR VERBS in the "vous" form, believe me, you will not regret it and it will impress the heck out of the Frenchies who mostly believe that Americans are too familiar, which is somewhat true. Blame all the talk-shows for this! Always use the vous form until they say in a light-hearted way that you can "tutoyer" them. Believe me, you'll love it and they'll love you more.<BR/>It's just another way to show respect. As for the doctor, I do agree with you but "vous" just shows respect for his profession. <BR/><BR/>Ciao Bella!<BR/><BR/>Felicia<BR/>www.nearandfar.wordpress.comAnonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-17042141.post-9772825677638536052007-11-23T15:36:00.000+01:002007-11-23T15:36:00.000+01:00Hey there! I've been bad about keeping up with th...Hey there! I've been bad about keeping up with the blogosphere recently, and I just wanted to drop in and say hello... The vous/tu debate has driven me crazy for years too, and just when I think I've gotten it down, they throw me another curveball... I do tend to always use "vous" with strangers and such, but then there's that fine line of what age is the person you're speaking with? I ran into a gal this week who wasn't feeling well at the train station, and I asked her if she was OK -- I vous-voied her, of course, as she was a complete stranger, but she must have been about 24 years old -- so nearly 10 years younger than me! And when she used "tu" at one point, I realized that I probably could have been using "tu" as well. But I just felt weird about it...<BR/><BR/>Then again, "vous" can come in handy when you just WANT to put distance in between yourself and another person who is trying to be TOO friendly and familiar... I can't come up with a good example right now, but I know it's come in handy in the past! When I was an English teacher's assistant, I was surprised because the teachers all told me that they would use "tu" amongst themselves and they told me to do the same, but many of the women were much older than me at the time, so I was always wary of offending someone. <BR/><BR/>And then there's my boyfriend's father: I always use "vous" out of respect with him, and yet I'd kind of like to use "tu" but he's never told me to do so... So I keep using "vous" for the moment, unless told to do otherwise. So frustrating! It can be a minefield sometimes.The Late Bloomerhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/08337578942279132688noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-17042141.post-45728630758963273412007-11-23T12:37:00.001+01:002007-11-23T12:37:00.001+01:00I actually come right out and ask people which the...I actually come right out and ask people which they want me to use...that is, if it's a friend of a friend/acquaintance. In all cases, they always say "tu", and I suppose it would be funny if they actually said, "I choose to maintain a respectful distance between us...use "vous". Actually, I'm almost certain that would make me laugh...in front of the person. :0l <BR/><BR/>Which four forms are you using? I'm familiar with three, though not at all fluent with them, but would like to choose my fourth wisely... /:0lAnonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-17042141.post-332536211481434702007-11-23T12:37:00.000+01:002007-11-23T12:37:00.000+01:00I actually come right out and ask people which the...I actually come right out and ask people which they want me to use...that is, if it's a friend of a friend/acquaintance. In all cases, they always say "tu", and I suppose it would be funny if they actually said, "I choose to maintain a respectful distance between us...use "vous". Actually, I'm almost certain that would make me laugh...in front of the person. :0l <BR/><BR/>Which four forms are you using? I'm familiar with three, though not at all fluent with them, but would like to choose my fourth wisely... /:0lAnonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-17042141.post-23276192635702083102007-11-23T11:45:00.000+01:002007-11-23T11:45:00.000+01:00Yeah, I habitually use the fact that I'm a native ...Yeah, I habitually use the fact that I'm a native English speaker as an excuse for using the wrong ÿou"---although it happens fairly rarely now. <BR/><BR/>I'm so paranoid about it that I'm actually improving.<BR/><BR/>Still, I need to study.<BR/><BR/>Blah!Madame Khttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10711262100071626133noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-17042141.post-77196413954022646222007-11-23T05:27:00.000+01:002007-11-23T05:27:00.000+01:00Vous just made my day. I have struggled for years...Vous just made my day. I have struggled for years to be able to order a glass of wine (whine.) Between the genders and the formal / informal it makes studying Mandarin look easy. <BR/><BR/>DavidTravelhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07787024407420088973noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-17042141.post-85959715551825928032007-11-22T23:20:00.000+01:002007-11-22T23:20:00.000+01:00Tock Tock Hey! I'm still here,(not far from Metz...Tock Tock Hey! I'm still here,(not far from Metz) haven't gone away, just been really bad about keeping my blog up to date! It is now, at least for the time being!<BR/>I've been here for 8 yrs and can totally relate to the whole tu/vous thing. I've noticed at times even the French have trouble knowing when to use it. There's this gray area, how do you know when to pass over to tu? what a pain!<BR/>Congrats on the new home!! Looks lovely! Sounds like it was worth all the headaches.<BR/>oh as for any ideas to get over the tu/vous thing. I just figure if I screw up,they chalk it up as a foreigner not knowing the the language. Hey, ignorance can be bliss right? Don't sweat it, I'm convinced the frenchies encounter the same dilema sometimes.Margiehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09494751108421563707noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-17042141.post-29834047794156172062007-11-21T11:43:00.000+01:002007-11-21T11:43:00.000+01:00I get annoyed with "vous" as the formal you, but I...I get annoyed with "vous" as the formal you, but I do happen to like it to mean the plural you because you in English can be vague sometimes. But, about "tu" vs. "vous", as much as I dislike it, I usually stick with "vous" unless I'm meeting/talking with a friend of a friend, a child or someone my own age(depending on the situation, though.) <BR/><BR/>So, as annoying as it is, that means I would stick with "vous" for anyone older than you that you don't know or any stranger like at shops or on the phone, etc. I wait until people tell me to call them "tu" and find it a bit ridiculous when I'm supposed to "vous" them, but they can "tu" me. Eww. But, like you said, you can always fall back on the foreigner thing and I think they don't find it as big of a deal. Bon courage!Leahhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/14698816373406087611noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-17042141.post-65089851604145080902007-11-21T11:18:00.000+01:002007-11-21T11:18:00.000+01:00i have that same problem.i pretty much avoid addre...i have that same problem.<BR/>i pretty much avoid addressing my adviser at all with verbs as im so unsure as to if i should be using tu or vous with him. its damn hard to have conversations without verbs!Sarahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11869813213951981071noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-17042141.post-72521706502456580712007-11-21T05:08:00.000+01:002007-11-21T05:08:00.000+01:00you go girl! i suppose once you are able to tell p...you go girl! i suppose once you are able to tell people where to go in a foreign language then you have reached a whole new level. now that you are super conscious of the whole 'vous/tu' thing it will work itself out. i am a brooklyn girl dreaming of living in france. you inspire me. continued success!Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-17042141.post-44540077834041051362007-11-20T21:17:00.000+01:002007-11-20T21:17:00.000+01:00"Il faut que tu kiss my ass" made me laugh out lou..."Il faut que tu kiss my ass" made me laugh out loud! I love it! I absolutely hate the subjunctive mood too. It's just as pointless as having two different words for you.<BR/><BR/>I have problems with tu and vous all the time. I can conjugate the verbs ok, but I seem to switch between the two in the same sentence.Jhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02700188628709124335noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-17042141.post-50342408376014450772007-11-20T16:12:00.000+01:002007-11-20T16:12:00.000+01:00Oh god, I am SO WITH YOU on the whole tu/vous thin...Oh god, I am SO WITH YOU on the whole tu/vous thing. I wish it were outlawed too. It creates a distance between people and a hierarchy that I absolutely despise!Jenniferhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03151900978527685272noreply@blogger.com