Tuesday, January 13, 2009

Whinge-Fest 2009

Oh I'm still here. And frankly it's a miracle that I haven't blogged in almost 2 weeks considering that all I've been doing is sitting around my house pouting and groaning.

Oh how I loathe winter.
This winter in particular has been a real downer. It's cold. I mean reallly cold. Even Marseille got snow! You see, hell has oficially frozen over. (Yes, I just snarked on Marseille for no good reason.)
Here in the armpit of France things aren't much better, it's ten degrees below zero---every gah-damned day. Ice cube weather. I haven't left the house in days, but since I'm out of bubble wrap I will have to bundle myself up and force myself out the door today. All that effort and for what? Fucking bubble wrap!

So if you haven't noticed by now I'm in a horrid little mood. Also I'm on a diet. No cake, no carbs, no liquor, makes Madame K a very cranky girl. On the other hand, if I ever want to shed the many kilos I have gained over the last 5 years in France, I'd better stay on the wagon. (More on that later.) Only 48 hours into my diet I'm wondering if life as a happily drunk fat girl isn't just plain better than life as skinny but impossibly cranky bitch. You know what I mean?

So, because I refuse to believe that I am the only one that is going through a kind of post-New Years blues and I know for a fact that at least 4 or 5 of you reading this blog must be feeling just as crappy as me at the moment, I am designating this here post as MSCLIF "Whinge-Fest 2009". Look, let's just get it out of our systems now, so we can get on with 2009.

De-lurk thyself, go to comments, and get to whingeing. Because if you don't, and I'm left standing here complainin' and moanin' all by myself, it'll make me feel just that more pitiful.

My fate is in your hands.


Cupcake said...

WELL, I think this is just what I need. I'm TERRIBLY cranky.
2008 was by far the worst year of my 20 years thus far.
2009 is going to be great, if I can ever get over the residual grump that 2008 left me in.
I am in the process of planning and gathering pieces for my FIRST EVER art exhibit. I have 16 pieces down on paper, planned, mapped, etc but now I'm in the process of scrounging together $200 for supplies to execute. Pawn shop, here I come! Oh well, it should be a sound investment. I have the opportunity to make about 5-6k if I do as well as everyone is saying I will. Or I could make nothing but a learning experience. Either way I win.
All while on a diet as well. Oh, Holidays. How bittersweet you are, with your delicious food and cold weather that makes drinking just irresistible. Stay strong. The crank will pass once you get into those skinny jeans, or notice some random part of your body looking thinner. But I agree on the theory of being a happy plump lady, than a skinny raging bitch.

Shanster said...

Hell yeah! I'm 38 and feel like I deserve some sort of reprieve from wanting to have a "perfect" body - whatever that is.

But yeah - here we are on a "no alcohol during the week" kick for the very same reason... health and lower calories etc.


I don't think I'm an alcoholic or anything but you get used to a nice glass o' wine to wind down and relax at night ya know?

And when it's taken away? I'm like a 3 yr old crying and whining for my favorite toy.

And yes, winter is bringing me down big time. My motivation is crap. I want to lay in bed all day long and sleep... it's so hard to get up when it is dark and cold and blowing... bleah, bleah, bleah.

I feel like a big ol' lazy, good for nuthin' toad. And a grouchy one at that.

I feel your pain. I suppose spring is coming... but seems like it's taking for-frickn'-ever...

The Stewart Report said...

Ah, just what I needed today!! I've been in a crap mood for weeks. Our house is falling down around us, the weather is abismally cold and rainy, my husband is sick (and so of course whining like a small child) and worst of all we both work for Dell. Let's just say neither of has hit quota in months thanks to this damn recession and it's looking like a nice place in Tent City if we don't start making some effing money soon.

I'm also trying to lose weight and going ot the gym three times a week TOTALLY sucks. I go to the gym while my friends go out for sushi? I'm starting to think life as a chubby girl has more possibilities. At least when we run out of food I can live off some of the stored fat!

The only bright spot is my wonderful daughter who cracks me up daily and keeps me from knocking back a bottle of wine a night.

Wow, that actually felt really good! Thanks!

Benny said...

Well I don't feel as crappy as I did before reading your blog, however, I have a love/hate relationship with my job. I want to leave it but need it all the same especially since we are in an aforementioned recession. I have laundry to do, French to study, and hair to wash. I can't complain about the weather because well I won't say what kind of weather we are getting in Oakland, CA right now but let's just say anyone of you would strangle me for ten minutes of our sunshine.

So when I'm having a crappy day I have a number of go to solutions. Madame K I'm so happy to include your blog in my "Sucky Day Emergency Kit."

Germaine said...

The temperature is dropping in Toronto; going down to -25C with the wind chill. Really don't feel the need to say anything more than that.

Madame K said...

Cupcake: Here's a fundraising idea for you---- Ask 20 of your friends and family for $10 each as an investment. Tell them that when the artwork is done they will be invited to a preview opening at your studio (which could be anywhere, your bedroom, kitchen, etc.) and that they will receive a $20 discount on any art purchase they make. Technically they will have doubled their money, plus helped out a friend in need.

Shanster: LMAO@ "I don't think I'm an alcoholic or anything."

Stewart Report: Life as a chubby girl DOES have more possibilities....except when it comes to clothing purchases---especially in France.

Benny---Oooh crap, you just reminded me that I too have laundry to do.

Germaine- I used to have this fantasy that I wanted to live in Toronto. You just stabbed it through the heart with a pencil.

Side note: What does it mean that reading other people's whinging is actually cheering me up?

Keep it comin!

Anonymous said...

omg, i'm delurking to complain. the weather here in chicagoland sucks extra bad this year. ice storms, many inches of snow, regular snowstorms, it's going to be below zero for the rest of this week and currently we are on blizzard watch. wow. i'm a social worker and my home visiting schedule has been total disrupted and immobilized by this weather. not to mention that we are moving in two weeks, yes my lovely husband wants to move in the winter, and i've pretty much done nothing towards leaving the current house. plus i NEED to be on a diet, but my life has me emotionally eating, so no go there. so now i'm fat, sluggish, discombobulated and bitchy. thanks for allowing this vent madame k, i feel so much better.

Megan said...

I'm with you. These are the dark days- I go to work in the dark, I come home in the dark to a messy apartment that just won't get finished and now I want to firebomb it. I can't wait for spring.

The Duchess said...

I'm really wondering why as humans we missed out on the whole hibernation part of the life cycle. Been writing letters left right and center to banks, the secu, you name it, just to say, 'can't pay it'. Real Estate is not really the job to be in at the moment (as if it is at anytime, but nevermind....).
The sky tv wasn't working this morning, the downstairs toilet is blocked, I haven't been doing anything constructive today but checking my emails way too much.
I get squat down when there is squat going on....
There, that feels better!
and my word verification is 'spasi'...

Suniverse said...

I've been reading your blog for a while. May I jump in and whinge?

* Just put new tires on my car - $450

* Just bought books for class - $450

* Just got an estimate for a new water heater [because the old one had to be replaced, oh, a year ago] $650

* It's cold and snow and will get colder the next few days.

* I don't have a job line up for after school in May. Nor am I ready to take the bar in July. Or to even pay for the bar exam or bar review classes.

* Still not losing weight and am too cold and lazy to go swim.

* Am enjoying reading blogs and other people's whinging. That's always something.

Alison said...

Well, let's see...the first Sunday of the New Year, I went on the wagon to help me in my quest to lose my "divorce kilos," all 20 of them. Two days later I got sick. I *never* get sick.

Today is my new husband's birthday, and while I'm well enough to cook him a nice dinner, I'm thinking there may have to be WINE, just because. And also, mmmm, WINE.

To top it off, Monday is my son's birthday, and those who read my blog know my kids live with their dad in France, and that means I can't kiss my boy on his b-day. And that's my own damn fault because nobody forced me to move back to the States, right? (Although staying in France within range of my ex and continuing to teach English in coll├Ęge may well have killed me.)

How was that for whingeing? Was that good enough? I can take it further, if you wish.

Also, hi. Delurking is kind of nice, as it forces you to not be so shy.

Ashley said...

Ooohhh. Let me jump on here too...

Lets see, I hate my job, the house we bought a year and a half ago seems really small, and due to the housing market in France looks like we might have to live here forever!! Oh, and I am trying to lose so weight but without going on a diet! I wish that I had more free time to explore photography and walk my dog.

On the other had I have 10 weeks paid vacation, and while small, we do have a roof over our heads, we are not starving and I guess that things will work themselves out at some point. Although it is nice to write it all out like that! Thanks!

American Black Chick in London said...

OK, I'm delurking to whine (although mine isn't so bad). I live in London which isn't known for it's great weather. The sun doesn't start rising until 8 AM (around the time the construction crew across the street thinks it's a good time to start using the heavy machinery) and starts to set at 4 PM. WTF? If I don't see proper sun soon (and for longer than a 15 minute period), I'm taking somebody's head off. And I'm *praying* for a week without rain. Is it summer yet? Wow that *does* feel better!

By any other name said...

Hi, I'm a lurker... I thought by reading other folks blogs I would feel inspired to do so. Eh, I'm no blogger but I have an account...

Anywho, I really hate my job it's not challenging nor fulfilling and the politics... Can you escape them? EVER? There ONLY 2 things that keep me going: my salary (so I've sold my soul) and finishing my MBA so I can say deuces to those trolls at my company.

Hang in there with the diet. I am also trying to become bikini fine by the summertime. I've just started exercising cause I need my cake. Heck, the other day I ate a slice of red velvet cake before 60 minutes of cardio. I gotta get those carbs some how!!!

Anonymous said...

Whingeing is a great success! I was pretty-much ok until yesterday, when it warmed up a hair and started to RAIN! GAD, I hate the rain, the incessent friggin' rain. It's so grey.
Anyhoo, as for weight, well crap, I'm 54, so why on earth do I need to wear skinny jeans, right?

Thanks Ms. K., for allowing us to rant a bit.
Be strong and don't cave in. Prozac isn't the answer.

OMYWORD! said...

What a great opportunity you've given to all of us. A little verbal relief valve.

So...It's been cold and icy in Paris, but finally rained yesterday and is warmer but still wet. I've got to go across town to the End Of The Metro and then walk and walk and walk in the rain to arrive soaked for my meeting. Good thing my client is a happy Irish person who will give me coffee and listen to me complain.

I'm not liking the sun rising after 8am and setting at 4pm. Especially if I have to get up and take a bath in my cold bathroom and scurry into the closet and throw on wrinkled clothes because we don't have a washer or dryer OR an iron.

At least I can see Sacre Couer from my bathtub. It still makes me smile to look at it.

When I went off of carbs for 7 years, I maintained a nice size 2. Now that I'm in France and eating bread like there's no tomorrow, I'm a very nice size 10-12. I'm trying to be philosophical and self-loving, but the truth is, I still want to be a size 2. 4? 8 would be fine.

I haven't sold my home in Arizona and it's been sitting empty for almost two freaking years. The pack rats have probably gnawed through all the walls and are having little cocktail parties and stinkin' up the place. But that doesn't mean I can stop pouring mortgage money into the sink hole. Walk away? Foreclose? Now there's an idea.

But, on the other hand, I dig my work as a writer and really like the people I work with and for. It's been my dream to make money from writing, and I'm finally doing so.

And I love Paris, icy, cold, wet or whatever. Spring will be here soon, and I'll wander along the Seine and smile.

Ahhh. Thanks for that! I feel better now! I hope you feel the same, Madame K, and soon.

Black and (a)Broad said...

Madame K,
know that four or five hours away in The Netherlands someone knows what you're going through. I did a recent post about gaining weight and working out when one is abroad. I've thought about giving up carbs and sugar, but "gah-damn" a sistah has to have something to look forward to at the end of the day. I hate cold weather too (even though i grew up In Indiana), and it's been below freezing here. I got outside with my family for a few days and actually skated on the frozen canals (well, I walked on them), and that picked my sprirts up so much. And all that cold, fresh air gave me the perfect excuse to drink a naughty cup of hot chocolate with whipped cream! Bundle up and go on out!

Travel said...

It is cold, getting colder, it is dark when I leave for the office and dark when I leave the office for home, my sweetie bear is 531 miles away because our jobs are not in the same state anymore.

Dearie, give yourself 20 years and you may give up the battle of the bulge.

Any yes, reading other people's complaints, make me feel better.


Madame K said...

more later, but first, funniest thing ever and oh so appropriate.


Rachael said...

Ok, I'll delurk as well. Mme K, I adore your blog and your furniture. One day the sprogs will be grown and we'll be able to have such lovely things to sit on. In the meantime, the drooling, munching, peeing and other stuff prevents us from buying anything.

I'm pretty ok though. I am 10 kg overweight and seem stuck that way but I'm not feeling the big urge to diet right now. Maybe because it's so dark -- we had mad sunshine and very very very cold temps here in Le Nord but now the grey is back!

Happy new year! And thanks for the bunny pic.

Torie said...

Wow! Let me jump in on this one! I have 2 year old triplets and they are in every bit of sense going throught the terrible two's! I am a Realtor and mortgage broker in one of the worst housing markets in history! Needless to say work is slow! I am still over weight two years after having my children. Gained 84lbs with the pregnancy and still have 50lbs to loose.
The holiday's were such a drag! The family actually drove me crazy! I promised my husband I would not be in South Florida for the holiday's next year. I may even be out of the country! UUHHGG! I think that is enough for now. If I think of anything else I will chime in again! :)

Madame K, I sent you an email a few weeks ago. I did not hear back from you. Please let me know if you received it. thanks.

Susan in Lille said...

I sent a big THANK YOU for the opportunity to post here.

I live in Lille, and though it is really cool that I live in France...I am not bilingual yet and am constantly having to deal with people that just can't understand me, even when I speak the correct words. Plus I am from Texas and every time anyone hears this they think I must be a Bush fan. Really? I swear I am going to bi$%@ slap the next Frenchie that says that to me. He is not even from Texas people. He moved there...

I felt I needed to work here, I used to own my own business and prior to that sold software and made some good coin. All I can do here is teach English. Guess what...apparently I am not a do gooder in this area. I hate it. I don't feel fulfilled (except one class does work for me) or any of that mushy crap. And I am finally loosing weight and what happens...I think we want to have kids. So I might get down to that 8 or 6 for about 36 hours (in which time I plan to shop my firm little ass off) but then it will continuously expand for 9 months after which I will not be able to sleep for like 3 years or something. And I will have saggy boobs.

But it's not that bad. Really. I'm sure of it. I think. I mean at least all the big girl sizes I can wear are still available at the solds since everyone here is thin. That's good. Right?

Dr. Goat said...

I don't really need to get my crankies out, but I just found your blog, Madame K, and it is awesome! I'm sure you already knew that, but I had to add my voice to the chorus of of adulation you can already hear (or read since this is the internet).

Whitney said...

Madame K,
It sure if uplifting to know that I am not suffering through this freezing cold winter alone (and I thought the South of France was supposed to be warm and beautiful!). My recent approach to the post holiday, fat-ass blues has been to drink too much Chartreuse and sleep with one of my friends. TMI? Sorry for it. And let me just say that my French friends are few and therefore VERY valuable. This is a recipe for disaster and deffinitely a dangerous approach to staving off depression. Might be better to be a bitch on a diet...